--- title: "1 Boner Quotes By Rob Delaney" description: "1 Boner quotes by Rob Delaney. Plus more from Rob Delaney and more Boner sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/032/rob-delaney-12520_quote_i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-w_1132888.jpg" --- > [“I became a diligent condom carrier and when most subsequent lovers had the good fortune to lie under my grunting, sweaty mass, they were always the grimacing recipient of an eager and rubber-sheathed penis boner.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-when-most-subsequent-lovers/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/032/rob-delaney-12520_quote_i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-w_1132888.jpg) ## More by Rob Delaney > [“Children give terrible gifts because they are poor.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/children-give-terrible-gifts-because-they-are-poor/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [I can say that I'm a feminist and I try to be progressive and all that stuff. But I when I'm tired or when…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-can-say-that-i-m-a-feminist-and-i-try-to-be-progressive-and-all/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [People who concern themselves with the rights of other adults who engage in consensual acts involving sex, love, and/or eating croissants together are damaged…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/people-who-concern-themselves-with-the-rights-of-other-adults-who/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [“If you ask someone out and they say no, try it again in a few minutes wearing sunglasses and smoking a cigarette.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/if-you-ask-someone-out-and-they-say-no-try-it-again-in-a-few-minutes/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [If you have an opinion on what other adults do consensually with other adults when they take their pants off, you're a weirdo.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/if-you-have-an-opinion-on-what-other-adults-do-consensually-with/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [Running is special. We've all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It's just elemental. Running is like fire.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/running-is-special-we-ve-all-done-it-well-poorly-focused-in-fear/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [“Willful ignorance or resistance to alleged facts has been a big ingredient in any success I’ve had.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/willful-ignorance-or-resistance-to-alleged-facts-has-been-a-big/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [“Cheesecake. Are you shitting me? Who invented that? Probably Jesus of Nazareth. Or maybe Louis Pasteur. It makes me physically sick to think that…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/cheesecake-are-you-shitting-me-who-invented-that-probably-jesus-of/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [I think your ambition for something changes as you go.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-think-your-ambition-for-something-changes-as-you-go/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [But I also know in standup, there's nowhere to hide. You get on stage and you deliver, or you are eviscerated and you are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/but-i-also-know-in-standup-there-s-nowhere-to-hide-you-get-on-stage/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [I want people to feel good about themselves.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-want-people-to-feel-good-about-themselves/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [“I like to imagine that those dead, unloved nut jobs became friends under the earth and have their little crazy community where they show…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-like-to-imagine-that-those-dead-unloved-nut-jobs-became-friends/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [With Twitter, you just want to make people laugh in their meeting; on stage, people have paid for their tickets with their hard-earned money,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/with-twitter-you-just-want-to-make-people-laugh-in-their-meeting-on/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [I use Twitter as a tool to get involved with people, to sell tickets to gigs where I can stand in a room and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-use-twitter-as-a-tool-to-get-involved-with-people-to-sell-tickets/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) > [We can and should complain about certain horrors of the modern world, but when it comes to the treatment of mental illness, the advances…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/we-can-and-should-complain-about-certain-horrors-of-the-modern-world/) [Rob Delaney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-delaney/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boner/rob-delaney/#itemlist", "name": "1 Boner Quotes By Rob Delaney", "numberOfItems": 1, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I became a diligent condom carrier and when most subsequent lovers had the good fortune to lie under my grunting, sweaty mass, they were always the grimacing recipient of an eager and rubber-sheathed penis boner.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Rob Delaney" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-delaney/i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-when-most-subsequent-lovers/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/032/rob-delaney-12520_quote_i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-w_1132888.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/032/rob-delaney-12520_quote_i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-w_1132888.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/032/rob-delaney-12520_quote_i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-w_1132888.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I became a diligent condom carrier and when most subsequent lovers had the good fortune to lie under my…” — Rob Delaney", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boner/rob-delaney/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boner/rob-delaney/", "name": "Boner Quotes by Rob Delaney", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/boner/rob-delaney/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/032/rob-delaney-12520_quote_i-became-a-diligent-condom-carrier-and-w_1132888.jpg" }, "description": "1 Boner quotes by Rob Delaney. 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