--- title: "30 Baseball Bat Quotes by 26 authors" description: "Browse 30 Baseball Bat quotes by 26 authors. Discover the best Baseball Bat sayings and thoughts." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/joel-osteen-194_baseball_don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-hol_49226.jpg" --- > [Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-holding-a-baseball-bat/) [Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/joel-osteen-194_baseball_don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-hol_49226.jpg) > [The crucifix ain't no baseball bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/live-band/the-crucifix-ain-t-no-baseball-bat/) [Live (Band](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/live-band/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5b9/live-band-20498_baseball_the-crucifix-ain-t-no-baseball-bat-27193_2719336.jpg) > [Next time you want to hit me hit me with a baseball bat or a crowbar!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephenie-meyer/next-time-you-want-to-hit-me-hit-me-with-a-baseball-bat-or-a-crowbar/) [Stephenie Meyer](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephenie-meyer/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/889/stephenie-meyer-91_baseball_next-time-you-want-to-hit-me-hit-me-with_649807.png) > [Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/never-hit-a-man-with-glasses-hit-him-with-a-baseball-bat/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78a/anonymous-1_dark_never-hit-a-man-with-glasses-hit-him-wit_1620299.jpg) > [When killing them with kindness doesn't work, I hear a baseball bat is really effective.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/when-killing-them-with-kindness-doesn-t-work-i-hear-a-baseball-bat-is/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4f3/anonymous-1_funny_when-killing-them-with-kindness-doesn-t_2296445.jpg) > [If you want to end darkness you cannot beat it with a baseball bat, you have to turn on a light.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marianne-williamson/if-you-want-to-end-darkness-you-cannot-beat-it-with-a-baseball-bat/) [Marianne Williamson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/marianne-williamson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e03/marianne-williamson-90_baseball_if-you-want-to-end-darkness-you-cannot-b_2211649.png) > [When you're mad at someone, it's probably best not to break his arm with a baseball bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evel-knievel/when-you-re-mad-at-someone-it-s-probably-best-not-to-break-his-arm/) [Evel Knievel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/evel-knievel/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a3/evel-knievel-5375_arms_when-you-re-mad-at-someone-it-s-probably_1092763.png) > [My ex? Yeah I'd still hit that... But with a car or a baseball bat! ;)](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kiki-strack/my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-but-with-a-car-or-a-baseball-bat/) [KiKi Strack](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kiki-strack/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/kiki-strack-15102_bad-relationship_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-but-with-a_1672538.jpg) > [My ex? Yeah, I'd still hit that. Only this time, it'd be with a car or a baseball bat...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-only-this-time-it-d-be-with-a-car-or-a/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f14/anonymous-1_ex-boyfriend_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-only-this_1566057.jpg) > [If a guy is taking his girl for granted, he really deserves a slap, with a baseball bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-tomlinson/if-a-guy-is-taking-his-girl-for-granted-he-really-deserves-a-slap/) [Louis Tomlinson](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/louis-tomlinson/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/918/louis-tomlinson-5821_baseball_if-a-guy-is-taking-his-girl-for-granted_811065.png) > [A brilliant idea without action is like Mark McGwire playing baseball without a bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-canfield/a-brilliant-idea-without-action-is-like-mark-mcgwire-playing-baseball/) [Jack Canfield](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jack-canfield/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f7/jack-canfield-796_action_a-brilliant-idea-without-action-is-like_377141.png) > [Ah wonder if anybody this side of the Atlantic has ever bought a baseball bat with playing baseball in mind.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irvine-welsh/ah-wonder-if-anybody-this-side-of-the-atlantic-has-ever-bought-a/) [Irvine Welsh](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/irvine-welsh/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/691/irvine-welsh-843_baseball_ah-wonder-if-anybody-this-side-of-the-at_1152106.png) > [If people got hit on the head by a baseball bat every week, pretty soon they would invent reasons why getting hit…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eliezer-yudkowsky/if-people-got-hit-on-the-head-by-a-baseball-bat-every-week-pretty/) [Eliezer Yudkowsky](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eliezer-yudkowsky/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e91/eliezer-yudkowsky-1207_baseball_if-people-got-hit-on-the-head-by-a-baseb_2763871.jpg) > [“Please tell me that’s a baseball bat in your pocket and not your cock. Because if that is mini-Fear, I think it’s…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/river-mitchell/please-tell-me-that-s-a-baseball-bat-in-your-pocket-and-not-your-cock/) [River Mitchell](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/river-mitchell/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99c/river-mitchell-78600_relationship_please-tell-me-that-s-a-baseball-bat-in_2576833.jpg) > [They took a baseball bat and whacked open his head. Mummy Boy fell to the ground; he finally was dead. Inside of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-burton/they-took-a-baseball-bat-and-whacked-open-his-head-mummy-boy-fell-to/) [Tim Burton](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tim-burton/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c1/tim-burton-2476_baseball_they-took-a-baseball-bat-and-whacked-ope_1265022.png) > [“In case you hadn’t noticed, there isn’t any heat in this place.” Nolan set the baseball bat aside and moved to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debbie-macomber/in-case-you-hadn-t-noticed-there-isn-t-any-heat-in-this-place-nolan/) [Debbie Macomber](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/debbie-macomber/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddd/debbie-macomber-2903_heat_in-case-you-hadn-t-noticed-there-isn-t-a_298025.png) > [A baseball bat could not have hit me harder than that smile did. I was sixteen years old. In that time, how…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-spinelli/a-baseball-bat-could-not-have-hit-me-harder-than-that-smile-did-i-was/) [Jerry Spinelli](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jerry-spinelli/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f24/jerry-spinelli-1413_baseball_a-baseball-bat-could-not-have-hit-me-har_304271.png) > [“I really wasn't sure if I wanted this guy knowing where I lived. After all, he was wielding a baseball bat, and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-hood/i-really-wasn-t-sure-if-i-wanted-this-guy-knowing-where-i-lived-after/) [Holly Hood](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/holly-hood/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/holly-hood-7442_dark_i-really-wasn-t-sure-if-i-wanted-this-gu_1573355.jpg) > [I'm from Boston, and in Boston, you are born with a baseball bat in your hand. And actually, most of the bats…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eli-roth/i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-born-with-a-baseball-bat-in/) [Eli Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eli-roth/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b32/eli-roth-2841_baseball_i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-bo_1970784.jpg) > [“If I had a baseball bat and bulldozer, maybe I could stop him. But without real weapons, without a pistol, a man-eating…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherman-alexie/if-i-had-a-baseball-bat-and-bulldozer-maybe-i-could-stop-him-but/) [Sherman Alexie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sherman-alexie/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb0/sherman-alexie-444_bubonic-plague_if-i-had-a-baseball-bat-and-bulldozer-ma_2002188.png) > [“I reached down and picked up a baseball bat at my feet and I flung it as hard as it could. It…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-anderson-kurk/i-reached-down-and-picked-up-a-baseball-bat-at-my-feet-and-i-flung-it/) [Laura Anderson Kurk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/laura-anderson-kurk/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddc/laura-anderson-kurk-7699_adoption_i-reached-down-and-picked-up-a-baseball_273663.jpg) > [“A little boy went out to the backyard to play with a baseball bat and a ball. He said to himself, “I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/a-little-boy-went-out-to-the-backyard-to-play-with-a-baseball-bat-and/) [Joel Osteen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joel-osteen/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/278/joel-osteen-194_baseball_a-little-boy-went-out-to-the-backyard-to_1837028.jpg) > [There are some people who might look better if you smacked them in the head with a baseball bat.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jared-leto/there-are-some-people-who-might-look-better-if-you-smacked-them-in/) [Jared Leto](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jared-leto/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f5c/jared-leto-2280_baseball_there-are-some-people-who-might-look-bet_3160358.jpg) > [You know I could get hit with a baseball bat and it don't mean nothing.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jorge-masvidal/you-know-i-could-get-hit-with-a-baseball-bat-and-it-don-t-mean-nothing/) [Jorge Masvidal](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jorge-masvidal/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/7aa/jorge-masvidal-5512_baseball_you-know-i-could-get-hit-with-a-baseball_2400136.jpg) > [“The sensation of a baseball bat to the face was not any more pleasant when it came from an unexpected direction, without…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-c-wright/the-sensation-of-a-baseball-bat-to-the-face-was-not-any-more-pleasant/) [John C. Wright](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-c-wright/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f25/john-c-wright-11300_baseball_the-sensation-of-a-baseball-bat-to-the-f_107329.jpg) > [He had a baseball bat and I was tied to a chair, pissing him off was the smart thing to do...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sangfroid-stalker/he-had-a-baseball-bat-and-i-was-tied-to-a-chair-pissing-him-off-was/) [SangFroid Stalker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sangfroid-stalker/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/344/sangfroid-stalker-1340_being-cool_he-had-a-baseball-bat-and-i-was-tied-to_2558461.jpg) > [I always keep a baseball bat under my bed in case someone tries to break in and pitch a no-hitter!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/green-monk/i-always-keep-a-baseball-bat-under-my-bed-in-case-someone-tries-to/) [Green Monk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/green-monk/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ab2/green-monk-388_baseball_i-always-keep-a-baseball-bat-under-my-be_2254669.jpg) > [“You can rationalise a baseball bat, but it still drastically changes the shape of your head. Three”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jason-arnopp/you-can-rationalise-a-baseball-bat-but-it-still-drastically-changes/) [Jason Arnopp](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jason-arnopp/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f96/jason-arnopp-41630_baseball_you-can-rationalise-a-baseball-bat-but-i_2057503.jpg) > [You know, I'm from Boston, and in Boston, you are born with a baseball bat in your hand.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eli-roth/you-know-i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-born-with-a-baseball/) [Eli Roth](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eli-roth/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b79/eli-roth-2841_baseball_you-know-i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-y_444329.jpg) > [If I ever modelled for Calvin Klein I'd give myself to a flock of fans to beat me silly with a baseball…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joey-jordison/if-i-ever-modelled-for-calvin-klein-i-d-give-myself-to-a-flock-of/) [Joey Jordison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joey-jordison/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/226/joey-jordison-3331_baseball_if-i-ever-modelled-for-calvin-klein-i-d_2008301.jpg) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/baseball-bat/#itemlist", "name": "Baseball Bat Quotes", "numberOfItems": 30, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Joel Osteen" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joel-osteen/don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-holding-a-baseball-bat/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/joel-osteen-194_baseball_don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-hol_49226.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/joel-osteen-194_baseball_don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-hol_49226.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9a4/joel-osteen-194_baseball_don-t-pick-on-your-sister-when-she-s-hol_49226.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.” — Joel Osteen", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The crucifix ain't no baseball bat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Live (Band" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/live-band/the-crucifix-ain-t-no-baseball-bat/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5b9/live-band-20498_baseball_the-crucifix-ain-t-no-baseball-bat-27193_2719336.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5b9/live-band-20498_baseball_the-crucifix-ain-t-no-baseball-bat-27193_2719336.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5b9/live-band-20498_baseball_the-crucifix-ain-t-no-baseball-bat-27193_2719336.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“The crucifix ain't no baseball bat.” — Live (Band", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Next time you want to hit me hit me with a baseball bat or a crowbar!", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Stephenie Meyer" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephenie-meyer/next-time-you-want-to-hit-me-hit-me-with-a-baseball-bat-or-a-crowbar/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/889/stephenie-meyer-91_baseball_next-time-you-want-to-hit-me-hit-me-with_649807.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/889/stephenie-meyer-91_baseball_next-time-you-want-to-hit-me-hit-me-with_649807.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/889/stephenie-meyer-91_baseball_next-time-you-want-to-hit-me-hit-me-with_649807.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Next time you want to hit me hit me with a baseball bat or a crowbar!” — Stephenie Meyer", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Anonymous" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/never-hit-a-man-with-glasses-hit-him-with-a-baseball-bat/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78a/anonymous-1_dark_never-hit-a-man-with-glasses-hit-him-wit_1620299.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78a/anonymous-1_dark_never-hit-a-man-with-glasses-hit-him-wit_1620299.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/78a/anonymous-1_dark_never-hit-a-man-with-glasses-hit-him-wit_1620299.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.” — Anonymous", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When killing them with kindness doesn't work, I hear a baseball bat is really effective.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Anonymous" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/when-killing-them-with-kindness-doesn-t-work-i-hear-a-baseball-bat-is/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4f3/anonymous-1_funny_when-killing-them-with-kindness-doesn-t_2296445.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4f3/anonymous-1_funny_when-killing-them-with-kindness-doesn-t_2296445.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/4f3/anonymous-1_funny_when-killing-them-with-kindness-doesn-t_2296445.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When killing them with kindness doesn't work, I hear a baseball bat is really effective.” — Anonymous", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 6, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If you want to end darkness you cannot beat it with a baseball bat, you have to turn on a light.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Marianne Williamson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/marianne-williamson/if-you-want-to-end-darkness-you-cannot-beat-it-with-a-baseball-bat/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e03/marianne-williamson-90_baseball_if-you-want-to-end-darkness-you-cannot-b_2211649.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e03/marianne-williamson-90_baseball_if-you-want-to-end-darkness-you-cannot-b_2211649.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e03/marianne-williamson-90_baseball_if-you-want-to-end-darkness-you-cannot-b_2211649.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If you want to end darkness you cannot beat it with a baseball bat, you have to turn on a light.” — Marianne Williamson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 7, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "When you're mad at someone, it's probably best not to break his arm with a baseball bat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Evel Knievel" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/evel-knievel/when-you-re-mad-at-someone-it-s-probably-best-not-to-break-his-arm/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a3/evel-knievel-5375_arms_when-you-re-mad-at-someone-it-s-probably_1092763.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a3/evel-knievel-5375_arms_when-you-re-mad-at-someone-it-s-probably_1092763.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3a3/evel-knievel-5375_arms_when-you-re-mad-at-someone-it-s-probably_1092763.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“When you're mad at someone, it's probably best not to break his arm with a baseball bat.” — Evel Knievel", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 8, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "My ex? Yeah I'd still hit that... But with a car or a baseball bat! ;)", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "KiKi Strack" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kiki-strack/my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-but-with-a-car-or-a-baseball-bat/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/kiki-strack-15102_bad-relationship_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-but-with-a_1672538.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/kiki-strack-15102_bad-relationship_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-but-with-a_1672538.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6ae/kiki-strack-15102_bad-relationship_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-but-with-a_1672538.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“My ex? Yeah I'd still hit that... But with a car or a baseball bat! ;)” — KiKi Strack", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 9, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "My ex? Yeah, I'd still hit that. Only this time, it'd be with a car or a baseball bat...", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Anonymous" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-only-this-time-it-d-be-with-a-car-or-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f14/anonymous-1_ex-boyfriend_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-only-this_1566057.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f14/anonymous-1_ex-boyfriend_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-only-this_1566057.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f14/anonymous-1_ex-boyfriend_my-ex-yeah-i-d-still-hit-that-only-this_1566057.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“My ex? Yeah, I'd still hit that. Only this time, it'd be with a car or a baseball bat...” — Anonymous", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 10, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If a guy is taking his girl for granted, he really deserves a slap, with a baseball bat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Louis Tomlinson" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/louis-tomlinson/if-a-guy-is-taking-his-girl-for-granted-he-really-deserves-a-slap/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/918/louis-tomlinson-5821_baseball_if-a-guy-is-taking-his-girl-for-granted_811065.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/918/louis-tomlinson-5821_baseball_if-a-guy-is-taking-his-girl-for-granted_811065.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/918/louis-tomlinson-5821_baseball_if-a-guy-is-taking-his-girl-for-granted_811065.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If a guy is taking his girl for granted, he really deserves a slap, with a baseball bat.” — Louis Tomlinson", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 11, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "A brilliant idea without action is like Mark McGwire playing baseball without a bat.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jack Canfield" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jack-canfield/a-brilliant-idea-without-action-is-like-mark-mcgwire-playing-baseball/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f7/jack-canfield-796_action_a-brilliant-idea-without-action-is-like_377141.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f7/jack-canfield-796_action_a-brilliant-idea-without-action-is-like_377141.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3f7/jack-canfield-796_action_a-brilliant-idea-without-action-is-like_377141.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“A brilliant idea without action is like Mark McGwire playing baseball without a bat.” — Jack Canfield", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 12, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "Ah wonder if anybody this side of the Atlantic has ever bought a baseball bat with playing baseball in mind.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Irvine Welsh" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/irvine-welsh/ah-wonder-if-anybody-this-side-of-the-atlantic-has-ever-bought-a/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/691/irvine-welsh-843_baseball_ah-wonder-if-anybody-this-side-of-the-at_1152106.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/691/irvine-welsh-843_baseball_ah-wonder-if-anybody-this-side-of-the-at_1152106.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/691/irvine-welsh-843_baseball_ah-wonder-if-anybody-this-side-of-the-at_1152106.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Ah wonder if anybody this side of the Atlantic has ever bought a baseball bat with playing baseball in mind.” — Irvine Welsh", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 13, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "If people got hit on the head by a baseball bat every week, pretty soon they would invent reasons why getting hit on the head with a baseball bat was a good thing.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Eliezer Yudkowsky" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eliezer-yudkowsky/if-people-got-hit-on-the-head-by-a-baseball-bat-every-week-pretty/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e91/eliezer-yudkowsky-1207_baseball_if-people-got-hit-on-the-head-by-a-baseb_2763871.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e91/eliezer-yudkowsky-1207_baseball_if-people-got-hit-on-the-head-by-a-baseb_2763871.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e91/eliezer-yudkowsky-1207_baseball_if-people-got-hit-on-the-head-by-a-baseb_2763871.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If people got hit on the head by a baseball bat every week, pretty soon they would invent reasons why…” — Eliezer Yudkowsky", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 14, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Please tell me that’s a baseball bat in your pocket and not your cock. Because if that is mini-Fear, I think it’s safe to predict which one of us will be the one getting fucked in this relationship.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "River Mitchell" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/river-mitchell/please-tell-me-that-s-a-baseball-bat-in-your-pocket-and-not-your-cock/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99c/river-mitchell-78600_relationship_please-tell-me-that-s-a-baseball-bat-in_2576833.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99c/river-mitchell-78600_relationship_please-tell-me-that-s-a-baseball-bat-in_2576833.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/99c/river-mitchell-78600_relationship_please-tell-me-that-s-a-baseball-bat-in_2576833.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Please tell me that’s a baseball bat in your pocket and not your cock. Because if that is mini-Fear, I think…” — River Mitchell", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 15, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "They took a baseball bat and whacked open his head. Mummy Boy fell to the ground; he finally was dead. Inside of his head were no candy or prizes, just a few stray beetles of various sizes.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Tim Burton" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tim-burton/they-took-a-baseball-bat-and-whacked-open-his-head-mummy-boy-fell-to/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c1/tim-burton-2476_baseball_they-took-a-baseball-bat-and-whacked-ope_1265022.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c1/tim-burton-2476_baseball_they-took-a-baseball-bat-and-whacked-ope_1265022.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c1/tim-burton-2476_baseball_they-took-a-baseball-bat-and-whacked-ope_1265022.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“They took a baseball bat and whacked open his head. Mummy Boy fell to the ground; he finally was dead…” — Tim Burton", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 16, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“In case you hadn’t noticed, there isn’t any heat in this place.” Nolan set the baseball bat aside and moved to the far wall to look at the radiator. “What’s wrong with it?” How like a man to ask stupid questions!”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Debbie Macomber" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/debbie-macomber/in-case-you-hadn-t-noticed-there-isn-t-any-heat-in-this-place-nolan/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddd/debbie-macomber-2903_heat_in-case-you-hadn-t-noticed-there-isn-t-a_298025.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddd/debbie-macomber-2903_heat_in-case-you-hadn-t-noticed-there-isn-t-a_298025.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddd/debbie-macomber-2903_heat_in-case-you-hadn-t-noticed-there-isn-t-a_298025.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“In case you hadn’t noticed, there isn’t any heat in this place.” Nolan set the baseball bat aside and moved…” — Debbie Macomber", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 17, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "A baseball bat could not have hit me harder than that smile did. I was sixteen years old. In that time, how many thousands of smiles had been aimed at me? so why did this one feel like the first?", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jerry Spinelli" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jerry-spinelli/a-baseball-bat-could-not-have-hit-me-harder-than-that-smile-did-i-was/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f24/jerry-spinelli-1413_baseball_a-baseball-bat-could-not-have-hit-me-har_304271.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f24/jerry-spinelli-1413_baseball_a-baseball-bat-could-not-have-hit-me-har_304271.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f24/jerry-spinelli-1413_baseball_a-baseball-bat-could-not-have-hit-me-har_304271.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“A baseball bat could not have hit me harder than that smile did. I was sixteen years old. In that time, how…” — Jerry Spinelli", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 18, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I really wasn't sure if I wanted this guy knowing where I lived. After all, he was wielding a baseball bat, and I had just seen him strike several people with that bat.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Holly Hood" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/holly-hood/i-really-wasn-t-sure-if-i-wanted-this-guy-knowing-where-i-lived-after/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/holly-hood-7442_dark_i-really-wasn-t-sure-if-i-wanted-this-gu_1573355.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/holly-hood-7442_dark_i-really-wasn-t-sure-if-i-wanted-this-gu_1573355.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/459/holly-hood-7442_dark_i-really-wasn-t-sure-if-i-wanted-this-gu_1573355.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I really wasn't sure if I wanted this guy knowing where I lived. After all, he was wielding a baseball bat…” — Holly Hood", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 19, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I'm from Boston, and in Boston, you are born with a baseball bat in your hand. And actually, most of the bats in Massachusetts are used off the field instead of on the field, and we all had baseball bats in our cars in high school.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Eli Roth" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eli-roth/i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-born-with-a-baseball-bat-in/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b32/eli-roth-2841_baseball_i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-bo_1970784.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b32/eli-roth-2841_baseball_i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-bo_1970784.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b32/eli-roth-2841_baseball_i-m-from-boston-and-in-boston-you-are-bo_1970784.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I'm from Boston, and in Boston, you are born with a baseball bat in your hand. And actually, most of the…” — Eli Roth", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 20, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“If I had a baseball bat and bulldozer, maybe I could stop him. But without real weapons, without a pistol, a man-eating lion, and a vial of bubonic plague, I had zero change of competing against him.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Sherman Alexie" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sherman-alexie/if-i-had-a-baseball-bat-and-bulldozer-maybe-i-could-stop-him-but/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb0/sherman-alexie-444_bubonic-plague_if-i-had-a-baseball-bat-and-bulldozer-ma_2002188.png", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb0/sherman-alexie-444_bubonic-plague_if-i-had-a-baseball-bat-and-bulldozer-ma_2002188.png", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bb0/sherman-alexie-444_bubonic-plague_if-i-had-a-baseball-bat-and-bulldozer-ma_2002188.png", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“If I had a baseball bat and bulldozer, maybe I could stop him. But without real weapons, without a pistol, a…” — Sherman Alexie", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 21, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“I reached down and picked up a baseball bat at my feet and I flung it as hard as it could. It circled and arced high in the air until it slammed against the side of the dining hall with a crack and fell. I sat down in the dirt. Then I lay down in the dirt. Because not only was there no trail to follow, there was no evidence he’d ever been here. There was no evidence any of them had been here.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Laura Anderson Kurk" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/laura-anderson-kurk/i-reached-down-and-picked-up-a-baseball-bat-at-my-feet-and-i-flung-it/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddc/laura-anderson-kurk-7699_adoption_i-reached-down-and-picked-up-a-baseball_273663.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddc/laura-anderson-kurk-7699_adoption_i-reached-down-and-picked-up-a-baseball_273663.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ddc/laura-anderson-kurk-7699_adoption_i-reached-down-and-picked-up-a-baseball_273663.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I reached down and picked up a baseball bat at my feet and I flung it as hard as it could. It circled and…” — Laura Anderson Kurk", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 22, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“A little boy went out to the backyard to play with a baseball bat and a ball. He said to himself, “I am the best hitter in the world.” Then he threw the ball up in the air and took a swing at it, but he missed. Without a moment’s hesitation, he picked up the ball and tossed it in the air again, saying as he swung the bat, “I’m the best hitter in all the world.” He swung and missed. Strike two. He tossed the ball up again, concentrating more intensely, even more determined, saying, “I am the best hitter in all the world!” He swung the bat with all his might. Whiff! Strike three. 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Wright", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 26, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "He had a baseball bat and I was tied to a chair, pissing him off was the smart thing to do...", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "SangFroid Stalker" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sangfroid-stalker/he-had-a-baseball-bat-and-i-was-tied-to-a-chair-pissing-him-off-was/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/344/sangfroid-stalker-1340_being-cool_he-had-a-baseball-bat-and-i-was-tied-to_2558461.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/344/sangfroid-stalker-1340_being-cool_he-had-a-baseball-bat-and-i-was-tied-to_2558461.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/344/sangfroid-stalker-1340_being-cool_he-had-a-baseball-bat-and-i-was-tied-to_2558461.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“He had a baseball bat and I was tied to a chair, pissing him off was the smart thing to do...” — SangFroid Stalker", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 27, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "I always keep a baseball bat under my bed in case someone tries to break in and pitch a no-hitter!", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Green Monk" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/green-monk/i-always-keep-a-baseball-bat-under-my-bed-in-case-someone-tries-to/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ab2/green-monk-388_baseball_i-always-keep-a-baseball-bat-under-my-be_2254669.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ab2/green-monk-388_baseball_i-always-keep-a-baseball-bat-under-my-be_2254669.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ab2/green-monk-388_baseball_i-always-keep-a-baseball-bat-under-my-be_2254669.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“I always keep a baseball bat under my bed in case someone tries to break in and pitch a no-hitter!” — Green Monk", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 28, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“You can rationalise a baseball bat, but it still drastically changes the shape of your head. Three”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Jason Arnopp" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jason-arnopp/you-can-rationalise-a-baseball-bat-but-it-still-drastically-changes/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f96/jason-arnopp-41630_baseball_you-can-rationalise-a-baseball-bat-but-i_2057503.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f96/jason-arnopp-41630_baseball_you-can-rationalise-a-baseball-bat-but-i_2057503.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f96/jason-arnopp-41630_baseball_you-can-rationalise-a-baseball-bat-but-i_2057503.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You can rationalise a baseball bat, but it still drastically changes the shape of your head. 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