--- title: "6 Assholes Quotes By Charles Bukowski" description: "6 Assholes quotes by Charles Bukowski. Plus more from Charles Bukowski and more Assholes sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edc/charles-bukowski-73_presidential-candida_the-problem-was-you-had-to-keep-choosing_377148.jpg" --- > [The problem was you had to keep choosing between one evil or another, and no matter what you chose, they sliced a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/the-problem-was-you-had-to-keep-choosing-between-one-evil-or-another-3/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/edc/charles-bukowski-73_presidential-candida_the-problem-was-you-had-to-keep-choosing_377148.jpg) > [“WHAT'S WRONG WITH ASSHOLES, BABY? YOU'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE, I'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE! YOU GO TO THE STORE AND BUY A PORTERHOUSE…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-you-ve-got-an-asshole-i-ve-got-an/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2c9/charles-bukowski-73_quote_what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-you-ve-g_716606.jpg) > [“R.O.TC. kept me away from sports while the other guys practiced every day. They made the school teams, won their letters and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/r-o-tc-kept-me-away-from-sports-while-the-other-guys-practiced-every/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/110/charles-bukowski-73_blue-and-white_r-o-tc-kept-me-away-from-sports-while-th_1092256.jpg) > [“They kept chirping and flipping and fingering their mental assholes.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/they-kept-chirping-and-flipping-and-fingering-their-mental-assholes/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/b4e/charles-bukowski-73_assholes_they-kept-chirping-and-flipping-and-fing_2701647.jpg) > [What's wrong with assholes, baby?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/082/charles-bukowski-73_assholes_what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-2790254_2790254.jpg) > [“And my own affairs were as bad, as dismal, as the day I had been born. The only difference was that now…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/and-my-own-affairs-were-as-bad-as-dismal-as-the-day-i-had-been-born/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/015/charles-bukowski-73_assholes_and-my-own-affairs-were-as-bad-as-dismal_2976334.jpg) ## Other authors on Assholes ## More by Charles Bukowski > [“sometimes when everything seems at its worst when all conspires and gnaws and the hours, days, weeks years seem wasted – stretched there upon…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/sometimes-when-everything-seems-at-its-worst-when-all-conspires-and/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [well, death says, as he walks by, I'm going to get you anyhow no matter what you've been: writer, cab-driver, pimp, butcher, sky-diver, I'm…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/well-death-says-as-he-walks-by-i-m-going-to-get-you-anyhow-no-matter/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“There is only one place to write and that is alone at a typewriter. A writer who has to go into the streets is…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/there-is-only-one-place-to-write-and-that-is-alone-at-a-typewriter-a/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [Even the stove and the refrigerator looked human, I mean good human - they seemed to have arms and voices and they said, hang…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/even-the-stove-and-the-refrigerator-looked-human-i-mean-good-human/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“nerves twitching in the sheets -- to face the sunlight again, that's clearly trouble. I like the city better when the neon lights are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/nerves-twitching-in-the-sheets-to-face-the-sunlight-again-that-s/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“Their Love Is Average, Seeks Average But There Is Genius In Their Hatred”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/their-love-is-average-seeks-average-but-there-is-genius-in-their/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“I climbed the stairway (there was no elevator) and put the key in. The door swung open. Somebody had changed all the furniture around,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/i-climbed-the-stairway-there-was-no-elevator-and-put-the-key-in-the/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“Strangers when you meet, strangers when you part -a gymnasium of bodies namelessly masturbating each other. People with no morals often considered themselves more…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/strangers-when-you-meet-strangers-when-you-part-a-gymnasium-of-bodies/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [I like to change liquor stores frequently because the clerks got to know your habits if you went in night and day and bought…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/i-like-to-change-liquor-stores-frequently-because-the-clerks-got-to/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“I was like a turd that drew flies instead of like a flower that butterflies and bees desired. I wanted to live alone,I felt…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/i-was-like-a-turd-that-drew-flies-instead-of-like-a-flower-that/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [It's 4:30 in the morning, it's always 4:30 in the morning.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/it-s-4-30-in-the-morning-it-s-always-4-30-in-the-morning/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [I had no feeling for the things so many others needed.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/i-had-no-feeling-for-the-things-so-many-others-needed/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“I am sick with caring.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/i-am-sick-with-caring/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [I went home each night dizzy and sick. He was murdering me with the sound of his voice.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/i-went-home-each-night-dizzy-and-sick-he-was-murdering-me-with-the/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) > [“the nights you fight best are when all the weapons are pointed at you, when all the voices hurl their insults while the dream…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/the-nights-you-fight-best-are-when-all-the-weapons-are-pointed-at-you/) [Charles Bukowski](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-bukowski/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/assholes/charles-bukowski/#itemlist", "name": "6 Assholes Quotes By Charles Bukowski", "numberOfItems": 6, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "The problem was you had to keep choosing between one evil or another, and no matter what you chose, they sliced a little more off you, until there was nothing left. At the age of 25 most people were finished. 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YOU'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE, I'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE! YOU GO TO THE STORE AND BUY A PORTERHOUSE STEAK, THAT HAD AN ASSHOLE! ASSHOLES COVER THE EARTH! IN A WAY TREES HAVE ASSHOLES BUT YOU CAN'T FIND THEM, THEY JUST DROP THEIR LEAVES. YOUR ASSHOLE, MY ASSHOLE, THE WORLD IS FULL OF BILLIONS OF ASSHOLES. THE PRESIDENT HAS AN ASSHOLE, THE CARWASH BOY HAS AN ASSHOLE, THE JUDGE AND THE MURDERER HAVE ASSHOLES . . . EVEN THE PURPLE STICKINPIN HAS AN ASSHOLE!”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Charles Bukowski" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-you-ve-got-an-asshole-i-ve-got-an/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2c9/charles-bukowski-73_quote_what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-you-ve-g_716606.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2c9/charles-bukowski-73_quote_what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-you-ve-g_716606.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2c9/charles-bukowski-73_quote_what-s-wrong-with-assholes-baby-you-ve-g_716606.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“WHAT'S WRONG WITH ASSHOLES, BABY? YOU'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE, I'VE GOT AN ASSHOLE! YOU GO TO THE STORE AND BUY A…” — Charles Bukowski", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“R.O.TC. kept me away from sports while the other guys practiced every day. They made the school teams, won their letters and got the girls. My days were spent mostly marching around in the sun. All you ever saw were the backs of some guy's ears and his buttocks. I quickly became disenchanted with military proceedings. The others shined their shoes brightly and seemed to go through maneuvers with relish. I couldn't see any sense in it. They were just getting shaped up in order to get their balls blown off later. On the other hand, I couldn't see myself crouched down in a football helmet, shoulder pads laced on, decked out in Blue and White, #69, trying to move out some brute with tacos on his breath so that the son of the district attorney could slant off left tackle for six yards. The problem was you had to keep choosing between on evil or another, and no matter what you chose, they sliced a little bit more off you, until there was nothing left. At the age of 25, most people were finished. 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The only difference was that now I could drink now and then, though never often enough. Drink was the only thing that kept a man from feeling forever stunned and useless. Everything else just kept picking and picking, hacking away. And nothing was interesting, nothing. The people were restrictive and careful, all alike. And I've got to live with these fuckers for the rest of my life, I thought. God, they all had assholes and sexual organs and their mouths and their armpits. They shit and they chattered and they were dull as horse dung. The girls looked good from a distance, the sun shining through their dresses, their hair. But get up close and listen to their minds running out of their mouths, you felt like digging in under a hill and hiding out with a tommy-gun. I would certainly never be able to be happy, to get married, I could never have children. Hell, I couldn't even get a job as a dishwasher.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Charles Bukowski" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-bukowski/and-my-own-affairs-were-as-bad-as-dismal-as-the-day-i-had-been-born/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/015/charles-bukowski-73_assholes_and-my-own-affairs-were-as-bad-as-dismal_2976334.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/015/charles-bukowski-73_assholes_and-my-own-affairs-were-as-bad-as-dismal_2976334.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/015/charles-bukowski-73_assholes_and-my-own-affairs-were-as-bad-as-dismal_2976334.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“And my own affairs were as bad, as dismal, as the day I had been born. 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