---
title: "272 Alarm Quotes by 226 authors"
description: "Browse 272 Alarm quotes by 226 authors. Discover the best Alarm sayings and thoughts."
image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c40/charles-duke-27852_alarm_roger-we-re-go-on-that-alarm-2380887_2380887.jpg"
---

> [Roger, we're go on that alarm](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/charles-duke/roger-we-re-go-on-that-alarm/)

[Charles Duke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/charles-duke/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c40/charles-duke-27852_alarm_roger-we-re-go-on-that-alarm-2380887_2380887.jpg)

> [I get up with an old-school alarm clock.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/ari-melber/i-get-up-with-an-old-school-alarm-clock/)

[Ari Melber](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/ari-melber/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/d7f/ari-melber-6528_alarm_i-get-up-with-an-old-school-alarm-clock_857675.jpg)

> [Program Alarm, it's a 1202.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/buzz-aldrin/program-alarm-it-s-a-1202/)

[Buzz Aldrin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/buzz-aldrin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/cd5/buzz-aldrin-954_alarms_program-alarm-it-s-a-1202-1860629_1860629.jpg)

> [No Alarm Clock Needed. My Passion Wakes Me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-thomas/no-alarm-clock-needed-my-passion-wakes-me/)

[Eric Thomas](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-thomas/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/f58/eric-thomas-1758_alarm_no-alarm-clock-needed-my-passion-wakes-m_1026914.png)

> [I'm out of bed before the alarm goes off.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/eric-dane/i-m-out-of-bed-before-the-alarm-goes-off/)

[Eric Dane](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/eric-dane/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c5/eric-dane-16292_alarm_i-m-out-of-bed-before-the-alarm-goes-off_2189627.jpg)

> [Buy our alarm clock and sleep soundly.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/buy-our-alarm-clock-and-sleep-soundly/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/8e6/anonymous-1_alarm-clock_buy-our-alarm-clock-and-sleep-soundly-12_1206466.jpg)

> [How reliable is your alarm clock?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rachel-mcadams/how-reliable-is-your-alarm-clock/)

[Rachel McAdams](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rachel-mcadams/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/66a/rachel-mcadams-3204_alarm_how-reliable-is-your-alarm-clock-2117124_2117124.png)

> [“Colt has the subtlety of a car alarm.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/karsten-knight/colt-has-the-subtlety-of-a-car-alarm/)

[Karsten Knight](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/karsten-knight/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9f4/karsten-knight-35229_humor_colt-has-the-subtlety-of-a-car-alarm-197_1974351.jpg)

> [Some times wwe think mabey if I just lay here the alarm wont ring... it always does](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kenzie-ann/some-times-wwe-think-mabey-if-i-just-lay-here-the-alarm-wont-ring-it/)

[Kenzie-ann](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kenzie-ann/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/83d/kenzie-ann-5282_good-morning_some-times-wwe-think-mabey-if-i-just-lay_1397799.jpg)

> [It's nice to see that look of alarm on the faces of the others.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/graham-chapman/it-s-nice-to-see-that-look-of-alarm-on-the-faces-of-the-others/)

[Graham Chapman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/graham-chapman/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c8c/graham-chapman-15627_alarms_it-s-nice-to-see-that-look-of-alarm-on-t_2129258.jpg)

> [To sound the alarm is not to panic but to seek action from an aroused public.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-f-kennedy/to-sound-the-alarm-is-not-to-panic-but-to-seek-action-from-an-aroused/)

[John F. Kennedy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/john-f-kennedy/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e66/john-f-kennedy-246_action_to-sound-the-alarm-is-not-to-panic-but-t_1572873.jpg)

> [If you're having trouble waking up for fajr, set your alarm to play Quran. It works!](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yasmin-mogahed/if-you-re-having-trouble-waking-up-for-fajr-set-your-alarm-to-play/)

[Yasmin Mogahed](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yasmin-mogahed/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5aa/yasmin-mogahed-1335_alarm_if-you-re-having-trouble-waking-up-for-f_548093.png)

> [Screw the alarm system. I've seen Home Alone, I know what to do.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/green-monk/screw-the-alarm-system-i-ve-seen-home-alone-i-know-what-to-do/)

[Green Monk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/green-monk/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/0c8/green-monk-388_alarm_screw-the-alarm-system-i-ve-seen-home-al_390977.jpg)

> [I can't cook. I use a smoke alarm as a timer.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/carol-siskind/i-can-t-cook-i-use-a-smoke-alarm-as-a-timer/)

[Carol Siskind](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/carol-siskind/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/9d2/carol-siskind-226052_alarm_i-can-t-cook-i-use-a-smoke-alarm-as-a-ti_2962119.jpg)

> [“We kiss until the alarm sounds off on my phone.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/we-kiss-until-the-alarm-sounds-off-on-my-phone/)

[Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c97/colleen-hoover-124_alarm_we-kiss-until-the-alarm-sounds-off-on-my_16563.jpg)

> [A car alarm is a way for a car to tell everyone that its owner is an asshole.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/demetri-martin/a-car-alarm-is-a-way-for-a-car-to-tell-everyone-that-its-owner-is-an/)

[Demetri Martin](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/demetri-martin/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/627/demetri-martin-511_alarm_a-car-alarm-is-a-way-for-a-car-to-tell-e_3137946.jpg)

> [For in the first place the American people could not have been swept too fast and too far in this movement without…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/for-in-the-first-place-the-american-people-could-not-have-been-swept/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/757/anonymous-1_alarm_for-in-the-first-place-the-american-peop_3119057.jpg)

> [“To step into your greatness is to acknowledge your innate thirst for adventure, growth, knowledge and wisdom and commit to doing the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/tony-jeton-selimi/to-step-into-your-greatness-is-to-acknowledge-your-innate-thirst-for/)

[Tony Jeton Selimi](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/tony-jeton-selimi/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/722/tony-jeton-selimi-283982_adventure_to-step-into-your-greatness-is-to-acknow_1676124.jpg)

> [During the week my alarm wakes me up at 6 A.M., so the latest I can sleep on Saturdays is about 7…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/bobbi-brown/during-the-week-my-alarm-wakes-me-up-at-6-a-m-so-the-latest-i-can/)

[Bobbi Brown](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/bobbi-brown/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/576/bobbi-brown-9752_about_during-the-week-my-alarm-wakes-me-up-at_2654755.png)

> [Pretty sure the bible says not to cheat, steal, murder or get out of bed on the first alarm.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/nikhil-saluja/pretty-sure-the-bible-says-not-to-cheat-steal-murder-or-get-out-of/)

[Nikhil Saluja](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/nikhil-saluja/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/fdc/nikhil-saluja-26_alarm_pretty-sure-the-bible-says-not-to-cheat_2702091.jpg)

> [I bought 13 alarm clocks and set them to go off at 5AM and put them all over my girlfriend's room. She…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/green-monk/i-bought-13-alarm-clocks-and-set-them-to-go-off-at-5am-and-put-them/)

[Green Monk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/green-monk/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/101/green-monk-388_alarm_i-bought-13-alarm-clocks-and-set-them-to_2521687.jpg)

> [I wake up every morning to 'Take a Chance on Me' as my iPhone alarm - it really gets you going.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/beanie-feldstein/i-wake-up-every-morning-to-take-a-chance-on-me-as-my-iphone-alarm-it/)

[Beanie Feldstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/beanie-feldstein/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/950/beanie-feldstein-12712_alarm_i-wake-up-every-morning-to-take-a-chance_1643932.jpg)

> [The only thing preventing me from smashing my alarm clock this morning is the fact that its my cellphone.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/the-only-thing-preventing-me-from-smashing-my-alarm-clock-this/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/141/anonymous-1_alarm_the-only-thing-preventing-me-from-smashi_415176.jpg)

> [I use my iPhone as an alarm, so when it goes off, I pick it up and casually scroll through whatever emails…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/maulik-pancholy/i-use-my-iphone-as-an-alarm-so-when-it-goes-off-i-pick-it-up-and/)

[Maulik Pancholy](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/maulik-pancholy/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/191/maulik-pancholy-35542_alarm_i-use-my-iphone-as-an-alarm-so-when-it-g_2232058.jpg)

> [What is the point of a car alarm if it doesn't get people out of their beds to come help you? So…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christian-finnegan/what-is-the-point-of-a-car-alarm-if-it-doesn-t-get-people-out-of/)

[Christian Finnegan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christian-finnegan/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/49c/christian-finnegan-15029_alarm_what-is-the-point-of-a-car-alarm-if-it-d_2584362.png)

> [First off, we've had sworn testimony from soldiers and testimony before our staff that wasn't sworn, that said these alarms rarely went…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/christopher-shays/first-off-we-ve-had-sworn-testimony-from-soldiers-and-testimony/)

[Christopher Shays](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/christopher-shays/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/446/christopher-shays-41350_after_first-off-we-ve-had-sworn-testimony-from_1576433.jpg)

> [“My alarm goes off at 5:50 a.m. First thing I do is check to make sure I'm not dead. If I am,…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/samantha-irby/my-alarm-goes-off-at-5-50-a-m-first-thing-i-do-is-check-to-make-sure/)

[Samantha Irby](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/samantha-irby/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/27f/samantha-irby-19558_chronic-illness_my-alarm-goes-off-at-5-50-a-m-first-thin_1142866.jpg)

> [Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/men-do-not-like-to-admit-to-even-momentary-imperfection-my-husband/)

[Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ae3/anonymous-1_alarm_men-do-not-like-to-admit-to-even-momenta_670735.jpg)

> [To-night I am going to take a party to the headquarters of the fire department, where I have a cinch on the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/richard-h-davis/to-night-i-am-going-to-take-a-party-to-the-headquarters-of-the-fire/)

[Richard H. Davis](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/richard-h-davis/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c06/richard-h-davis-29523_about_to-night-i-am-going-to-take-a-party-to-t_144240.jpg)

> [I was always the kid at school who thought it was a good idea to set off the fire alarm. And much…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/james-corden/i-was-always-the-kid-at-school-who-thought-it-was-a-good-idea-to-set/)

[James Corden](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/james-corden/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/251/james-corden-7028_alarm_i-was-always-the-kid-at-school-who-thoug_1348831.jpg)

> [If I'm going to the White House, my alarm goes off at 5:00 A. M. Typically there is no snoozing; jump out…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kristen-welker/if-i-m-going-to-the-white-house-my-alarm-goes-off-at-5-00-a-m/)

[Kristen Welker](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kristen-welker/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/1d0/kristen-welker-17746_alarm_if-i-m-going-to-the-white-house-my-alarm_2769171.jpg)

> [I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/p-j-o-rourke/i-like-michael-moore-but-i-think-of-him-more-as-a-rabble-rouser-on/)

[P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/p-j-o-rourke/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/6e2/p-j-o-rourke-184_alarm_i-like-michael-moore-but-i-think-of-him_1706785.png)

> [“When I sit up I am greeted by the world. Level with the treetops I look down on sparrows swooping in and…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/daniel-hays/when-i-sit-up-i-am-greeted-by-the-world-level-with-the-treetops-i/)

[Daniel Hays](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/daniel-hays/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/de0/daniel-hays-180533_adventure_when-i-sit-up-i-am-greeted-by-the-world_2241256.jpg)

> [“Jenks snickered. “Yeah, Rache. Why bother? I mean, this could be good. Ivy could invite her mom over for a housewarming. We’ve…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/kim-harrison/jenks-snickered-yeah-rache-why-bother-i-mean-this-could-be-good-ivy/)

[Kim Harrison](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/kim-harrison/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/5d8/kim-harrison-323_alarm_jenks-snickered-yeah-rache-why-bother-i_1496710.jpg)

> [“Since we live in a world of appearances, people are judged by what they seem to be. If the mind can't read…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/erik-pevernagie/since-we-live-in-a-world-of-appearances-people-are-judged-by-what/)

[Erik Pevernagie](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/erik-pevernagie/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/859/erik-pevernagie-688_alarm_since-we-live-in-a-world-of-appearances_1576565.jpg)

> [“I switched the light out again. The room was totally dark, not even the starlight showing while my eyes adjusted. Perhaps I…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/iain-banks/i-switched-the-light-out-again-the-room-was-totally-dark-not-even-the/)

[Iain Banks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/iain-banks/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/029/iain-banks-3752_alarm_i-switched-the-light-out-again-the-room_1492499.png)

> [“Thursday morning. I usually let my Mum wake me up but today I have set my alarm for seven. Even from under…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/joe-dunthorne/thursday-morning-i-usually-let-my-mum-wake-me-up-but-today-i-have-set/)

[Joe Dunthorne](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/joe-dunthorne/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/c82/joe-dunthorne-14534_alarm_thursday-morning-i-usually-let-my-mum-wa_1790472.jpg)

> [“The day that changed my life was one of those days. The crappy kind. Normal people have a whole lot of them.…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/emma-chase/the-day-that-changed-my-life-was-one-of-those-days-the-crappy-kind/)

[Emma Chase](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/emma-chase/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/3b4/emma-chase-699_alarm_the-day-that-changed-my-life-was-one-of_2985916.jpg)

> [“Think about something else," Kaitlyn said. "Did you ever find a cow alarm clock around here?" "No. A what?" "An alarm clock…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/l-j-smith/think-about-something-else-kaitlyn-said-did-you-ever-find-a-cow-alarm/)

[L.J. Smith](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/l-j-smith/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/aaf/l-j-smith-962_alarm_think-about-something-else-kaitlyn-said_287518.jpg)

> [“guess the question is, how paranoid do you want to be? How many guns does it take to make you feel safe?…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/stephen-king/guess-the-question-is-how-paranoid-do-you-want-to-be-how-many-guns/)

[Stephen King](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/stephen-king/)

[Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/739/stephen-king-13_children_guess-the-question-is-how-paranoid-do-yo_1433345.jpg)

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                        "text": "“Colt has the subtlety of a car alarm.”",
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                        "text": "Some times wwe think mabey if I just lay here the alarm wont ring... it always does",
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                        "text": "It's nice to see that look of alarm on the faces of the others.",
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                        "text": "To sound the alarm is not to panic but to seek action from an aroused public.",
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                        "text": "If you're having trouble waking up for fajr, set your alarm to play Quran. It works!",
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                        "text": "Screw the alarm system. I've seen Home Alone, I know what to do.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I can't cook. I use a smoke alarm as a timer.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“We kiss until the alarm sounds off on my phone.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "A car alarm is a way for a car to tell everyone that its owner is an asshole.",
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                        "text": "For in the first place the American people could not have been swept too fast and too far in this movement without enough alarms being sounded to be heard and heeded.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“To step into your greatness is to acknowledge your innate thirst for adventure, growth, knowledge and wisdom and commit to doing the required actions.”",
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                        "text": "During the week my alarm wakes me up at 6 A.M., so the latest I can sleep on Saturdays is about 7 A.M.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Pretty sure the bible says not to cheat, steal, murder or get out of bed on the first alarm.",
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                        "text": "I bought 13 alarm clocks and set them to go off at 5AM and put them all over my girlfriend's room. She hates me!",
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                        "text": "I wake up every morning to 'Take a Chance on Me' as my iPhone alarm - it really gets you going.",
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                        "text": "The only thing preventing me from smashing my alarm clock this morning is the fact that its my cellphone.",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "I use my iPhone as an alarm, so when it goes off, I pick it up and casually scroll through whatever emails may have come in while I was asleep.",
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                        "text": "What is the point of a car alarm if it doesn't get people out of their beds to come help you? So if I ever have a car alarm - if I ever have a car - it's just going to be a big speaker on the back of my car. And when anybody tries to break in, it's just gonna go: Attention! Free bags of weed! Come get your free bags of weed!",
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                        "text": "First off, we've had sworn testimony from soldiers and testimony before our staff that wasn't sworn, that said these alarms rarely went off, that they went off after the war in most cases and went off a lot.",
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                        "text": "“My alarm goes off at 5:50 a.m. First thing I do is check to make sure I'm not dead. If I am, in fact, still alive, I usually sob uncontrollably until there's nothing left in my tear ducts but salt dust, then grope blindly through my apartment to the bathroom, where I say a little prayer for a hole to open beneath my building and swallow us all.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code... he turned himself in.",
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                            "@type": "Person",
                            "name": "Anonymous"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "To-night I am going to take a party to the headquarters of the fire department, where I have a cinch on the captain, a very nice fellow, who is unusually grateful for something I wrote about him and his men. They are going to do the Still Alarm act for me.",
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                        "text": "I was always the kid at school who thought it was a good idea to set off the fire alarm. And much as I'm aware that that's a trait which also propels other things which are good, I wish I could just pause and go, 'Is this really what you want to do?'",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "If I'm going to the White House, my alarm goes off at 5:00 A. M. Typically there is no snoozing; jump out of bed, text my producer, often start texting with sources if there's breaking news that's happened overnight, and I'm off and running from that moment on.",
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                        "text": "I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the home of the guy who invented the car alarm and set off all the car alarms on the block... pretty funny.",
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                            "name": "P. J. O'Rourke"
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“When I sit up I am greeted by the world. Level with the treetops I look down on sparrows swooping in and out of the branches. The tide, the new rising moon, the clouds, the wind - these greet me. These are my allies. The whole planet is laid out before me and available for whatever adventure the day will take me on. By comparison, living in society seems to require an alarm clock. Primarily assembled from angst and fish anuses, these contraptions, regardless of your soul's whereabouts, will slap and assault you into a pitiful state of what passes for consciousness. Your first sight is the Time, an arragement of molecules on the clock's face to whom you will be enslaved for the rest of the day. You may as well call him \"master.\" Next, a pile of dirty clothes on the floor, a knocked-over glass of water, and so forth, until you are so overwhelmed with despair that to prevent hurling yourself through the window, you must ignore your personal bill of rights, put on an acceptable frown, and go about your business, disregarding the pleas from you increasingly timid soul.”",
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                        "@type": "Quotation",
                        "text": "“Jenks snickered. “Yeah, Rache. Why bother? I mean, this could be good. Ivy could invite her mom over for a housewarming. We’ve been here a year, and the woman is dying to come over. Well, at least she would be if she were still alive.” Worried, I looked up from the phone book. Alarm sifted over Ivy. For a moment it was so quiet I could hear the clock above the sink, and then Ivy jerked, her speed edging into that eerie vamp quickness she took pains to hide. “Give me the phone,” she said, snatching it.”",
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                        "text": "“Since we live in a world of appearances, people are judged by what they seem to be. If the mind can't read the predictable features, it reacts with alarm or aversion. Faces which don’t fit in the picture are socially banned. An ugly countenance, a hideous outlook can be considered as a crime and criminals must be inexorably discarded from society. ( \"Ugly mug offense\" )”",
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                            "name": "Erik Pevernagie"
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                        "text": "“I switched the light out again. The room was totally dark, not even the starlight showing while my eyes adjusted. Perhaps I would ask for one of those LED alarm radios, though I’m very fond of my old brass alarm clock. Once I tied a wasp tot the striking-surface of each of the copper-coloured bells on top, where the little hammer would hit them in the morning when the alarm went off. I always wake up before the alarm goes, so I got to watch.”",
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                        "text": "“Thursday morning. I usually let my Mum wake me up but today I have set my alarm for seven. Even from under my duvet, I can hear it bleating on the other side of my room. I hid it inside my plastic crate for faulty joysticks so that I would have to get out of bed, walk across the room, yank it out of the box by its lead and, only then, jab the snooze button. This was a tactical manoeuvre by my previous self. He can be very cruel.”",
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                        "text": "“The day that changed my life was one of those days. The crappy kind. Normal people have a whole lot of them. It starts when I open my eyes—forty minutes later than I’m supposed to. Stupid alarm clock. It should know I mean a.m. Who the hell needs to wake up at four p.m.? No one, that’s who. Forget about self-driving cars; Google needs to move their asses on self-aware alarm clocks.”",
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                        "text": "“Think about something else,\" Kaitlyn said. \"Did you ever find a cow alarm clock around here?\" \"No. A what?\" \"An alarm clock shaped like a cow. It was Lewis's. It used to go off every morning, this sound like a cowbell and then a voice shouting 'Wake up! Don't sleep your life away!' And then it would moo.\" Lydia giggled faintly. \"I wish I'd seen that. It sounds-like Lewis.\" \"Actually, it sounded like a cow.\" Kaitlyn could hear Lydia snorting softly in the darkness for a while, then silence. She pulled the covers over her head and went to sleep.”",
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                        "text": "“guess the question is, how paranoid do you want to be? How many guns does it take to make you feel safe? And how do you simultaneously keep them loaded and close at hand, but still out of reach of your inquisitive children or grandchildren? Are you sure you wouldn’t do better with a really good burglar alarm? It’s true you have to remember to set the darn thing before you go to bed, but think of this — if you happened to mistake your wife or live-in partner for a crazed drug addict, you couldn’t shoot her with a burglar alarm.”",
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                            "caption": "“guess the question is, how paranoid do you want to be? How many guns does it take to make you feel safe? And…” — Stephen King",
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