--- title: "1 Abusive Marriage Quotes By Susan Weitzman" description: "1 Abusive Marriage quotes by Susan Weitzman. Plus more from Susan Weitzman and more Abusive Marriage sayings from other authors." image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_consider-these-traditional-theories-of-d_202119.jpg" --- > [“Consider these traditional theories of domestic abuse: - Learned helplessness suggest that abused women learn to become helpless under abusive conditions; they are powerless to extricate themselves from such relationships and/or unable to make adaptive choices - The cycle of…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/consider-these-traditional-theories-of-domestic-abuse-learned/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) [Image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_consider-these-traditional-theories-of-d_202119.jpg) ## More by Susan Weitzman > [“Consider these traditional theories of domestic abuse: - Learned helplessness suggest that abused women learn to become helpless under abusive conditions; they are powerless…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/consider-these-traditional-theories-of-domestic-abuse-learned/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“When a woman is convinced that she can stop the violence in her marriage, her stubborn determination feeds her sense of failure each time…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-a-woman-is-convinced-that-she-can-stop-the-violence-in-her/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“Canadian researcher Donald Dutton . . has written that marital work with a man who has a history of relationship violence may be a…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/canadian-researcher-donald-dutton-has-written-that-marital-work-with/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“As she breaks the silence, the upscale abused wife begins to feel affirmed and validated. The rationalizations she once relied on to sustain her…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/as-she-breaks-the-silence-the-upscale-abused-wife-begins-to-feel/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“Once this bubble of self-deception is burst and the mask that shielded her and others from what she wished to ignore is lifted, it…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/once-this-bubble-of-self-deception-is-burst-and-the-mask-that/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“Julia's fears of coming forward with the violence were based on anticipated as well as actual responses from friends and acquaintances. I also recognized…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/julia-s-fears-of-coming-forward-with-the-violence-were-based-on/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“When others witness or comment on abusive behaviors, the little voice that the upscale abused wife once heard inside her and ignored or muffled…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/when-others-witness-or-comment-on-abusive-behaviors-the-little-voice/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) > [“But if he is angry at the world for doing him harm, why does he take it out on his loving partner? Couldn’t he…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/but-if-he-is-angry-at-the-world-for-doing-him-harm-why-does-he-take/) [Susan Weitzman](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/susan-weitzman/) ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "ItemList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/#itemlist", "name": "1 Abusive Marriage Quotes By Susan Weitzman", "numberOfItems": 1, "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "item": { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "“Consider these traditional theories of domestic abuse: -\tLearned helplessness suggest that abused women learn to become helpless under abusive conditions; they are powerless to extricate themselves from such relationships and/or unable to make adaptive choices -\tThe cycle of violence describes a pattern that includes a contrition or honeymoon phase. The abusive husband becomes contrite and apologetic after a violent episode, making concerted efforts to get back in his wife’s good graces. -\tTraumatic bonding attempts to explain the inexplicable bond that is formed between a woman and her abusive partner -\tThe theory of past reenactments posits that women in abusive relationships are reliving unconscious feelings from early childhood scenarios. My research results and experience with patients do not conform to these concepts. I have found that the upscale abused wife is not a victim of learned helplessness. Rather, she makes specific decisions along the path to be involved in the abusive marriage, including silent strategizing as she chooses to stay or leave the marriage. Nor does the upscale abused wife experience the classic cycle of violence, replete with the honeymoon stage, in which the husband courts his wife to seek her forgiveness. As in the case of Sally and Ray, the man of means actually does little to seek his wife’s forgiveness after a violent episode. Further, the upscale abused wife voices more attachment to her lifestyle than the traumatic bonding with her abusive mate. And very few of the abused women I have met over the years experienced abuse in their childhoods or witnessed it between their parents. In fact, it is this lack of experience with violence, rage, and abuse that makes this woman even more overwhelmed and unclear about how to cope with something so alien to her and the people in her universe.”", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Susan Weitzman" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/susan-weitzman/consider-these-traditional-theories-of-domestic-abuse-learned/", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_consider-these-traditional-theories-of-d_202119.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_consider-these-traditional-theories-of-d_202119.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_consider-these-traditional-theories-of-d_202119.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“Consider these traditional theories of domestic abuse: - Learned helplessness suggest that abused women…” — Susan Weitzman", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } } } ] }, { "@type": "CollectionPage", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/#webpage", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/", "name": "Abusive Marriage Quotes by Susan Weitzman", "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "mainEntity": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/#itemlist" }, "primaryImageOfPage": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/802/susan-weitzman-48483_abuse_consider-these-traditional-theories-of-d_202119.jpg" }, "description": "1 Abusive Marriage quotes by Susan Weitzman. Plus more from Susan Weitzman and more Abusive Marriage sayings from other authors.", "breadcrumb": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/#breadcrumb" } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/#breadcrumb", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Topics", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/categories/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "Abusive Marriage", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 5, "name": "Susan Weitzman", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/about/abusive-marriage/susan-weitzman/" } ] }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```