--- title: "Meaning & Key Takeaway of: You are what you are when nobody is…" description: "\"You are what you are when nobody is looking.\" — Abigail Van Buren" image: "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg" --- # You are what you are when nobody is looking. ![“You are what you are when nobody is looking.” quote by Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg) [Download](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg) [Open image](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg) > “You are what you are when nobody is looking.” [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) ## About This Quote This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation. Behavior when unobserved reveals authentic character, emphasizing integrity over image. **In simple terms:** People act true to themselves when alone. Key Takeaway Cultivate honesty in private. Themes integrity authenticity self‑awareness Mood thoughtful serious Type ethical psychological When to use this quote - personal relationships - workplace ethics - self‑reflection Key Concepts moral psychology behavioral consistency privacy Questions to Reflect On - What habits reveal your true self? - How can you ensure consistency across contexts? A Different Perspective People may still act inauthentically even when alone. ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ No ratings yet ## Related quotes > [I'm tired of looking for the perfect guy. From now on.. he can look for me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-m-tired-of-looking-for-the-perfect-guy-from-now-on-he-can-look-for/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [The woman who gave birth to me, I don't have a relationship with. I'm not looking for one, either.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jordan-fisher/the-woman-who-gave-birth-to-me-i-don-t-have-a-relationship-with-i-m/) [Jordan Fisher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jordan-fisher/) > [“God isn't looking for perfect people. He is looking to perfect people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-hileman/god-isn-t-looking-for-perfect-people-he-is-looking-to-perfect-people/) John Hileman > [“I’ve been looking for you my whole damn life.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/i-ve-been-looking-for-you-my-whole-damn-life/) [Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/) > [I've played a mother before, but it's always been a very young child, which is closer to what I can imagine my own life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrea-riseborough/i-ve-played-a-mother-before-but-it-s-always-been-a-very-young-child/) [Andrea Riseborough](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrea-riseborough/) > [If it comes, it comes, but its not like a main focus. If you go looking for something youre never gone find what youre…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/akon/if-it-comes-it-comes-but-its-not-like-a-main-focus-if-you-go-looking/) [Akon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/akon/) > [Whenever I was flying commercial, I would land in Chicago, and they would announce, 'Get your passports out.' It happened so often, I would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shahid-khan/whenever-i-was-flying-commercial-i-would-land-in-chicago-and-they/) [Shahid Khan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shahid-khan/) > [The hard-working Mexican tries to get up here looking for opportunities because America's one of the greatest countries in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-ruiz-jr/the-hard-working-mexican-tries-to-get-up-here-looking-for/) [Andy Ruiz Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-ruiz-jr/) > [Nothing is really broke, so it's not like I can fix it. I just have to keep trying to find what I'm looking for.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-addison-allen/nothing-is-really-broke-so-it-s-not-like-i-can-fix-it-i-just-have-to/) [Sarah Addison Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-addison-allen/) > [I will support my party when they are right on an issue, but am not afraid to stand up to party bosses who are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darlene-senger/i-will-support-my-party-when-they-are-right-on-an-issue-but-am-not/) Darlene Senger > [I'm just always looking forwards. I spend very little time, looking backwards.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-vaynerchuk/i-m-just-always-looking-forwards-i-spend-very-little-time-looking/) [Gary Vaynerchuk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-vaynerchuk/) > [I'm looking to fight the best guys in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yair-rodriguez/i-m-looking-to-fight-the-best-guys-in-the-world/) [Yair Rodriguez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yair-rodriguez/) > [Once you stop looking for what you what you find exactly what you need](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cynthia/once-you-stop-looking-for-what-you-what-you-find-exactly-what-you-need/) [Cynthia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cynthia/) > [With multiplayer, permanent death, and an ever-changing world to explore and conquer, 'A Valley Without Wind' might be the place you're looking for if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-manuel/with-multiplayer-permanent-death-and-an-ever-changing-world-to/) [Rob Manuel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-manuel/) > [It's very important to me that I look good when I go out publicly. I like looking at my clothes rack in the morning…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-wintour/it-s-very-important-to-me-that-i-look-good-when-i-go-out-publicly-i/) [Anna Wintour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-wintour/) ## More by Abigail Van Buren > [Some People are more turned on by money than they are by love. In one respect they're alike. They're both wonderful as long as…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/some-people-are-more-turned-on-by-money-than-they-are-by-love-in-one/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [Kids grow up awfully fast these days,"she said. "You should try to have a good relationship with your kids, no matter what they do.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/kids-grow-up-awfully-fast-these-days-she-said-you-should-try-to-have/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [How should they answer?](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/how-should-they-answer/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [If you don't value what you have, you're sure to lose it.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/if-you-don-t-value-what-you-have-you-re-sure-to-lose-it/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“The best index to a perso's character is how he treats people who can't do him any good and how he treats people who…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/the-best-index-to-a-perso-s-character-is-how-he-treats-people-who-can/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“In response to a letter regarding the writer's lack of religious belief: The lack of faith is not doubt. It is certainty.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/in-response-to-a-letter-regarding-the-writer-s-lack-of-religious/) [Abigail van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [The lack of faith is not doubt. It is certainty.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/the-lack-of-faith-is-not-doubt-it-is-certainty/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“You could move.” ~Abigail Van Buren, "DEAR ABBY" In response to a reader who complained that a gay couple was moving in across the…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/you-could-move-abigail-van-buren-dear-abby-in-response-to-a-reader/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [The less you talk, the more you're listened to.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/the-less-you-talk-the-more-you-re-listened-to/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [Fear less, hope more. Eat less, chew more. Talk less, say more. Hate less, love more...](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/fear-less-hope-more-eat-less-chew-more-talk-less-say-more-hate-less/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [Accept every blind date you can get, even with a girl who wears jeans. Maybe you can talk her out of them.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/accept-every-blind-date-you-can-get-even-with-a-girl-who-wears-jeans/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can't speak for my twin sister.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/it-is-true-that-i-was-born-in-iowa-but-i-can-t-speak-for-my-twin/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“JUST FOR TODAY, I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow. I will not set…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/just-for-today-i-will-live-through-this-day-only-i-will-not-brood/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [If we could sell our experiences for what they cost us, we'd all be millionaires.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/if-we-could-sell-our-experiences-for-what-they-cost-us-we-d-all-be/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) > [“The church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/the-church-is-a-hospital-for-sinners-not-a-museum-for-saints/) [Abigail Van Buren](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) [Explore all 51 Abigail Van Buren quotes ](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/) ## More Looking quotes > [I'm tired of looking for the perfect guy. From now on.. he can look for me.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anonymous/i-m-tired-of-looking-for-the-perfect-guy-from-now-on-he-can-look-for/) [Anonymous](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anonymous/) > [With multiplayer, permanent death, and an ever-changing world to explore and conquer, 'A Valley Without Wind' might be the place you're looking for if…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/rob-manuel/with-multiplayer-permanent-death-and-an-ever-changing-world-to/) [Rob Manuel](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/rob-manuel/) > [Once you stop looking for what you what you find exactly what you need](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/cynthia/once-you-stop-looking-for-what-you-what-you-find-exactly-what-you-need/) [Cynthia](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/cynthia/) > [I'm looking to fight the best guys in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/yair-rodriguez/i-m-looking-to-fight-the-best-guys-in-the-world/) [Yair Rodriguez](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/yair-rodriguez/) > [I'm just always looking forwards. I spend very little time, looking backwards.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/gary-vaynerchuk/i-m-just-always-looking-forwards-i-spend-very-little-time-looking/) [Gary Vaynerchuk](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/gary-vaynerchuk/) > [I will support my party when they are right on an issue, but am not afraid to stand up to party bosses who are…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/darlene-senger/i-will-support-my-party-when-they-are-right-on-an-issue-but-am-not/) Darlene Senger > [Nothing is really broke, so it's not like I can fix it. I just have to keep trying to find what I'm looking for.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/sarah-addison-allen/nothing-is-really-broke-so-it-s-not-like-i-can-fix-it-i-just-have-to/) [Sarah Addison Allen](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/sarah-addison-allen/) > [The hard-working Mexican tries to get up here looking for opportunities because America's one of the greatest countries in the world.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andy-ruiz-jr/the-hard-working-mexican-tries-to-get-up-here-looking-for/) [Andy Ruiz Jr](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andy-ruiz-jr/) > [Whenever I was flying commercial, I would land in Chicago, and they would announce, 'Get your passports out.' It happened so often, I would…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/shahid-khan/whenever-i-was-flying-commercial-i-would-land-in-chicago-and-they/) [Shahid Khan](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/shahid-khan/) > [If it comes, it comes, but its not like a main focus. If you go looking for something youre never gone find what youre…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/akon/if-it-comes-it-comes-but-its-not-like-a-main-focus-if-you-go-looking/) [Akon](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/akon/) > [I've played a mother before, but it's always been a very young child, which is closer to what I can imagine my own life…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/andrea-riseborough/i-ve-played-a-mother-before-but-it-s-always-been-a-very-young-child/) [Andrea Riseborough](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/andrea-riseborough/) > [“I’ve been looking for you my whole damn life.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/colleen-hoover/i-ve-been-looking-for-you-my-whole-damn-life/) [Colleen Hoover](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/colleen-hoover/) > [“God isn't looking for perfect people. He is looking to perfect people.”](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/john-hileman/god-isn-t-looking-for-perfect-people-he-is-looking-to-perfect-people/) John Hileman > [The woman who gave birth to me, I don't have a relationship with. I'm not looking for one, either.](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/jordan-fisher/the-woman-who-gave-birth-to-me-i-don-t-have-a-relationship-with-i-m/) [Jordan Fisher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/jordan-fisher/) > [It's very important to me that I look good when I go out publicly. I like looking at my clothes rack in the morning…](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/anna-wintour/it-s-very-important-to-me-that-i-look-good-when-i-go-out-publicly-i/) [Anna Wintour](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/anna-wintour/) Browse all 5,428 Looking quotes ```json { "@context": "https://schema.org", "@graph": [ { "@type": "Quotation", "text": "You are what you are when nobody is looking.", "creator": { "@type": "Person", "name": "Abigail Van Buren" }, "isPartOf": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website" }, "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-looking/", "about": { "@type": "Thing", "name": "Looking" }, "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-looking/#quotation", "image": { "@type": "ImageObject", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg", "contentUrl": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/2a6/abigail-van-buren-13275_looking_you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-look_784732.jpg", "width": 1080, "height": 1080, "caption": "“You are what you are when nobody is looking.” — Abigail Van Buren", "creditText": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "creator": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } } }, { "@type": "BreadcrumbList", "itemListElement": [ { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 1, "name": "Home", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 2, "name": "Quotes", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 3, "name": "Abigail Van Buren", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/author/abigail-van-buren/" }, { "@type": "ListItem", "position": 4, "name": "You are what you are when...", "item": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-looking/" } ], "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/abigail-van-buren/you-are-what-you-are-when-nobody-is-looking/#breadcrumb" }, { "@type": "WebSite", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#website", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "publisher": { "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization" } }, { "@type": "Organization", "@id": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/#organization", "name": "SMS4Smile Quotes", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/", "logo": { "@type": "ImageObject", "url": "https://sms4smile.com/quotes/wp-content/themes/sq/assets/icons/icon-512.png", "width": 512, "height": 512 } } ] } ```