Funny SMS / Text Messages

My Girlfriend Told Me
If I Bought Her One More Stupid Gift
She Would Burn It
So I Bought her A Candle :P

What does ILU means?

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (26 votes, average: 3.08 out of 5)
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What does ILU means?

I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu...
tum kya samjhey they...
I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon

Made in Pakistan

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (26 votes, average: 4.23 out of 5)
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Americans make a car
& 2 get some touch ups
They snd it 2 Japan
& they add a faster engine
Thn Japan sent it 2 UK
Who then added tinted windows
Who thn sent d car to China.
They added a better interior.
Thn they sent it 2 Pakistan.
Pakistani luk @ d car & see
What a good job all of them have done.
So they flip the car over
&
Put a stamp on MADE IN PAKISTAN

Make sure it's cheap

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (26 votes, average: 3.81 out of 5)
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The 1st Advice Of
Father To His Son
When Son Got His
Driving License Made,
Is
"Remember 1 Thing Son
If U're Going To Hit
Anything, Make Sure
Its Cheap"

Company making tissues

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (19 votes, average: 4.05 out of 5)
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Man 1:
"I m Always Delighted
When People Stick Their
Noses In My
Business."

Man 2:
"Why, What Do You Do?"

Man 1:
"i've A Company, Make
Tissue Papers ..." ;->

Elephant sat on mercedes

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (37 votes, average: 3.65 out of 5)
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What Happens When
The Elephant Sat On
The Mercedes Car ... ???
.
.
.
.
Everyone Knows
"The Mercedes bends" ;->

Santa's sexy wife

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (61 votes, average: 3.52 out of 5)
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2 men were searching for their lost wife in a festival.
Banta: What does your wife look like?
Santa: She is 5'7", 36-24-36 sexy figure,
fair, sweet, beautiful, green sexy eyes, brown hair, and yours?

Banta: Forget mine, let us look for yours.

Can You Define Who Is LECTURER?

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (62 votes, average: 3.97 out of 5)
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Teacher To Student:

Can You Define Who Is LECTURER?

Student : A LECTURER Is A Person Who Has A Very Bad
Habit Of Speaking When Someone Is SLeeping.

Man on right & women on left

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (35 votes, average: 3.31 out of 5)
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Q: Do u knw y in a couple's photo
man is on d right side & woman on d left?
A: Coz as per balance sheet,Liabilities r on d
Left Side & Assets on d Right!

A girl & boy were sitting alone

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (65 votes, average: 3.71 out of 5)
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A girl & boy were sitting alone,
that boy started touching de girl,

Girl : dont touch me, all this only after marriage.

Boy : ok call me when u r married.

This was a missed call

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (42 votes, average: 3.95 out of 5)
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One day Raja and rani
decided to send messages
to each other by using
Pigeon instead of mobile.
The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.
He angried and called to rani.
She told stupid "This was a missed call"

I wrote your name on my heart

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (68 votes, average: 3.66 out of 5)
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I wrote your name on sand,
it got washed.

I wrote your name in air,
it was blown away.

I wrote your name on my heart &
i got Heart Attack.