Funny SMS / Text Messages

A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
“Hey vaheguru meri lottery lagady.”

After 11 years VaheGuru angrily appeared
& said,”Khoti de putar 1 vari ticket te le ley”

Man standing on the scale,
holding his stomach in.
Wife:I do not think that is going to help.
Man:Sure it does. How else could I see the numbers?

Soldier:Sir, we are surrounded!
Major:Excellent!
We can attack in any direction now!

A man sees a fat man
sitting in a train cabin.

Taunting, he asks:
Is this cabin for elephants only!

Fat man humbly replies:
No!Even monkeys like you can sit!

Ek admi aadi raat ko apni moti biwi se bola
k sisak sisak ke marna theek hai ya ek dum.
BIWI : Ek dum.
Aadmi : To apni dusri tang bhi mujh per rakh do.

Wife:”
Mujhe kisi mehangi jaga le ke chaliye na ji”
.
.
.
Husband:Chalo, tayyar ho jao…”
.
.
.
.
.
Petrol pump chaltay hain:D

A boy goes to see a dance.

His mom angrily asks him:
Did u see anything there that
u were not supposed to see?

Boy: yes, I saw dad!

News reporter:
KHAN SAAB ye batain k plateform
par kharay saray pathan kaisay maray?
Pathan: aik elan hua k train plateform per aa rahi hai,
sub ne patri par chalang laga di.
Reporter:Phir aap kaisay buch gaye?
Pathan:main khudkushi k liye patri per leta tha,
ye elan suna to main plateform per ja ker lait gaya:)